You think you are crazy. I hear you tell yourself as much every night as you try to stand in a world that is so sane and reasonable. And maybe you are crazy; every artist has the madman in him.
I grew up thinking painters were mentally flawed because every story about every painter was one of insanity. And every manic killer who ended up in jail turned to art. This is the channel, the outlet.
But you are not crazy in that way. And you are afraid of what would come out if you picked up a paintbrush. Instead you would rather hide in other identities. By being someone else more often than yourself, you get to play sane. And people love you for it.
Look at me! I'm very good at this and perfectly all right!
No you're not.
You won't ever be until you confront it rather than hiding it under layers of stage makeup.
Because it will keep haunting you, this feeling, and one day you will look back and see your life was all pretend. It was all "what if" and nothing real.
You think you are crazy. You know your friends would say you are if you told them what you really think. So you've bottled it up. You keep your words to what is respectable and have no one to really talk to.